This is the final article of my living onboard series, and this month I want to write about all the odds and ends of being domiciled on a boat. Both the good and the bad, because not everything about the lifestyle will be delightful - life's just not like that.
One of the bad aspects is all the things you'll have to go without, simply because they are not available when you embrace a waterborne lifestyle. Some of them I can easily do without - like cable TV. I've heard some marinas are wired for these facilities, but I have not seen them. But the biggest thing I have done without personally is the telephone - landline, that is.
The marina does not facilitate this, although I believe it will be incorporated some time in the future. The absence of a landline telephone has meant all calls are made from my mobile, and that's expensive. It also rules out connection to the internet, but while going without an email address is a bit of a nuisance, I manage somehow.
Not being able to garage the car has never bothered me, but it is a big worry to others - every time we get a threatened thunderstorm, there's a mad scramble in the car park as people desperately drive to the nearest service station to protect the car from hail damage.
PET PEEVES
Possibly one of the biggest decisions to be made before that quantum leap from land to water is the question of the family pet - and here I want to limit this to either a cat or a dog. If you have a pet horse and want to live aboard then you have a problem that I certainly can't help solve!
With a dog it's different, as I have lived aboard my present boat for over eight years and my kelpie cattle cross "Hacksaw" (pictured above) has been my constant companion during that time. I have experienced little trouble with keeping a dog, but she has always been with me whenever I leave the boat and has almost never been alone. I think this is the main reason that it has worked out so well.
I have been fortunate in that I have been self-employed and been able to have the dog where I work. I generally give her a final walk at night so there is seldom a problem with her toilet habits - but I'm an early riser anyway, and I check the marina for droppings first thing in the morning.
As a general rule, I don't think it's possible to leave a dog alone onboard all day while you go off to work - for the obvious reason that there is little room for the animal to exercise. However, a few years ago a couple who had a small Dashund did exactly that at the marina where I live, and the dog seemed perfectly well adjusted to it - so perhaps it depends on the breed.
If you do have a pet and are thinking of moving aboard, then the first thing I would suggest is to consult with the marina management to see if they permit it. The general reaction is usually "no", but it's not always the case. Over the years of moving around the waterways of Brisbane and the Gold Coast, I have only once been refused berthing permission because of the dog - most marinas simply ask that you keep the dog under control and not allow it to foul the walkways, and these are requests that most of us would no doubt find reasonable.
A final word on the subjects of dogs onboard: they are almost a full-time commitment - far more so than when living in a house. Therefore, a lot of decisions on what you do and where you go will revolve around the pooch. You'll just have to be prepared for it.
Turning to cats, they are far less trouble and seem to adjust to life on the sea very easily. Friends of mine have had their cat onboard since she was a kitten and have never had any problems. The attitude of marina owners in general seems to be that cats are alright - but it is always best to check with them first.
Don't expect everyone around you to be pet lovers, whether it be a dog or a cat - more than one ship has left its berth because of disagreements over animals, and when this happens it's almost always the boat with the pet onboard that's asked to leave.
GLASS HOUSES
Another subject that springs to mind from this ragbag of odds and ends is being on display - particularly on the weekends. Most people just love to walk around a marina and look at the boats, even if they are not interested in them for themselves - and although some people are aware that it's rude to peer into your windows and suchlike, many others are not.
There's not much you can do about it except grit your teeth and assume a look of vacant stupidity - I find that generally seems to daunt them somewhat. Once I was told, in all seriousness, that people liked my boat because it had nice, wide footpaths around it. I just smiled and went inside for a beer.
Occasionally someone with a genuine interest will come along and an intelligent conversation will ensue. In some cases, a friendship can even blossom - so it's not all bad.
While we are on the subject of pests, this is the category that the dinghy is soon slotted into. Some marinas have dinghy racks ashore that can be rented for a small fee - and if this service is available, it sure makes living onboard a little easier.
It depends just where the dinghy is stored on the boat, and it's this issue that can lead to some friction between the boat owner and marina management. Most berthing fees are assessed by the length of the boat occupying the berth - thus, a boat 30ft in length will not pay as much as a 35-footer, even though they may be side by side in identical berths.
If, however, the 30ft boat just happens to have a dinghy in davits at the stern, it may in fact be longer overall than the 35-footer alongside - and perhaps even extend slightly onto the walkway. If that's the case, the marina management could ask the owner to move, and pay for a larger berth.
This can cause a fair bit of ill feeling. My advice is to store the dinghy, if possible, to allow for free use of the deck space - but it can be an intractable problem.
COST OF LIVING
Fees for living onboard vary according to the views of the marina management. In my particular case, the levy is an additional thirty per cent - which is a fair slug, but there's not much that can be done about it.
Management's attitude is that additional facilities such as showers and toilets have to be provided for, and therefore they are entitled to charge extra to help defray the cost. It is a subject that could be debated. Personally, I think most marinas charge a liveaboard fee simply because they can.
Another minor irritation is the fact that GST is levied on the rental, even though the boat is your principal place of residence. For me that's an additional $500 per year. Having a good old moan to my local member achieved exactly zero - in fact, it is impossible to get anyone even slightly interested. I now just cop it sweet, but I can't see the fairness of it.
The problem is that when you live on a boat you tend to lose a bit of status in society. You're no longer a hard-working ratepayer, and you're not even a battler - battlers, after all, can't afford boats. In fact, you're not much of anything that can be readily pigeonholed. The local constabulary is inclined to view you as "no fixed address"; the library will be convinced there is a fair chance you'll disappear over the horizon with its precious books; and as far as the Federal Government is concerned, you may as well not exist - I never even got my fridge magnet!
A COMMON AFFLICTION
Perhaps the biggest challenge you will face after deciding to live on the water is staying interested in boating per se. This may sound a bit like an oxymoron, but it is the result of a disease I call "marinaitis". This deadly illness is slow to develop, but over time it will rob the average person of the desire to take his or her boat out of the berth.
Most of us moved onboard out of a love of all things nautical - I know I did. I thought how easy it was going to be to take the boat out - no more packing an esky; the hassle of driving to the marina and finding a car park would be a thing of the past, and so on. Sadly, it often doesn't turn out like that.
For a while, the boat does get used more often - and some of those weekends at anchor were simply the best. Slowly though, over a period of time, more and more reasons crop up not to take the boat out: too many mugs out there on the weekends, too many jetskis spoiling the peace, etc, etc. In fact, it is easy to let a couple of months slip by without moving the ship - and the feelings of guilt can soon make one feel uncomfortable.
Well, if this is you, my advice is to not worry about it. If you take pleasure in the lifestyle of simply being onboard your boat, if you like the people around you (and it does tend to get neighbourly), then lay back and simply enjoy it. As long as the maintenance is kept up to scratch and the engine is given a run every so often, where is the harm? I have friends who haven't taken their boat out in over four years and I certainly don't think any the less of them for that - after all, what is there to prove?
BACK TO THE FUTURE
As can be seen, some of these odds and ends do tend to show the downside of life onboard a boat - which is just as well, because I would hate to write about it while looking through rose-coloured glasses.
One thing that's a bit of a worry in the back of the mind is the lack of capital growth in the value of your boat. If you have ample shore-based investments, then this will not concern you - however, I think most of us generally sell the house to buy the boat to live onboard.
This is relatively easy to do, as we are blessed in this country with a constantly-rising property market - so generally the price obtained for the house produces a nice tax-free gain that can be used to purchase the boat of our dreams. None of this would be a problem if we intended to stay on the boat for the rest of our lives - but we humans are prone to changing our minds, and what once appeared to be cast in stone can now be seen to have been written in sand.
So now perhaps it's time to swallow the anchor and move ashore? Well there might be a little problem here if you have lived on the boat for a number of years because, sadly, the boat will have been really lucky to have maintained it's value while the cost of houses has probably at least doubled.
Not a problem if you are cashed up and have plenty of investments, but it can be a real headache for some as they get older. I have friends in their 70s who live onboard, and for them the lifestyle is changing into a nightmare. Their boat is a houseboat and these are difficult to sell at the best of times - and unfortunately the maintenance has been allowed to slip a little.
Thus, their ship does not present its best - and as a consequence, it has been on the market for over two years without an offer. Declining health and age are starting to make their situation desperate, but with all their money tied up in the boat, it's imperative that it be sold to allow the transition ashore.
They have given up all thought of ever being able to buy a place again - now it's simply a case of finding good rental accommodation close to medical facilities.
The money from the boat will be used to purchase appliances and furniture, with perhaps a little left over for rainy days.
I sure hope it turns out well for them. I can only urge any readers that are contemplating life on a boat to think all the ramifications through, and plan for the day when it comes time to reverse the decision and crawl back to land. It will be a darn sight harder than the move the other way.
SIGNING OFF
So there it is: the good and the bad. Pretty much the way life is, no matter how you live it. Soon my turn will come and I'll swallow the hook and look for a place ashore - after all, I've lived on this boat for nearly 10 years, and for six on the others.
I have to admit that they have been good years, and I would do it all over again the same way given the chance. Some days, when sitting on the after deck with the warm Queensland sun sinking in the sky, a contented kelpie snoring gently nearby, it seems as if it could never get any better than this.
As with any change, there will be much that is missed. I'll look forward to meeting you again in the next series.